Fun fact: Stephen King doesn't really believe in outlining his stories before he writes them. That means his brain just goes at it and, along the way, surprises itself with works of somehow-still-foreshadowing genius. His kind of brilliance definitely deserves a whopping 77 movie adaptations, and the loyal following that rose him to fame deserves to get paid to watch Stephen King movies. And now one person may be.
The satellite TV provider Dish wants to pay a scary movie fan a $1,300 lump sum for putting in the emotional labor required to watch 13 King classics. The only requirement is that you have to be over 18 years-old and detail-oriented, because the job requires you to track your experience along the way. This does not mean Snapchatting a photo of yourself making Jack Nicholson's face from the cover of The Shining; the tracking must be more thorough blogging or social media usage.
The company wants you to share your thoughts about each film. It also want you to wear a FitBit to see how much you freak out during the film, then how much sleep you lose afterwards. Kind of dark, Dish.
Along with giving you money and a FitBit, the company will provide copies of every film (friggin sweet), a flashlight, blanket, popcorn, candy, Stephen King paraphernalia, and a gift card to see either Chapter 2 or Doctor Sleep in theaters.
I know how much you loved watching the murderous adventures of the appliance repairman in The Mangler Reborn (it ranked last on our list), but Dish has already picked out the 13 movies for you. Here they are:
- Carrie (original or 2013 remake)
- Children of the Corn
- It (original or 2017 remake)
- The Mist
- Pet Sematary (original or 2019 remake)
- Salem’s Lot
- The Shining
To apply for this position, just submit a 200-word essay (and optional video) on Dish’s site before October 16. Try writing it Stephen King style and hope your random idea will morph into a work of literary genius.