This News Segment Targeting Kids With Slang Is Unbearably Awkward

You're getting older. It's inevitable. Part of you knows this, but part of you still thinks you're at least five years younger than you are. If you've ever wondered if you're pulling off the slang you're trying to adopt around younger coworkers...

You're getting older. It's inevitable. Part of you knows this, but part of you still thinks you're at least five years younger than you are. If you've ever wondered if you're pulling off the slang you're trying to adopt around younger coworkers, this newscast is the cautionary tale you need.

Toledo's WTOL news station spent a little time wishing good luck to public school students on a recent broadcast. It was certainly a little tongue-in-cheek, but that didn't help dial down the cringe factor as the news team spoke to the youth in a hip, fresh language the kids understand.

It's not just broadcasters yelling "yeeeeet" or trying Cardi B's signature "OKURRR," it's a full blizzard of slang strung together in a way that almost makes it hard to discern if there was a real message buried underneath all the dope slang from those bae newscasters. 

"Goooaaals," one anchor offers. "Say 'Bye Felicia' to that testing stress." Cool. 

So, kids, listen to your favorite anchors. Be "extra extra" with your studies and "stay woke." You know, because, um, "weather's gonna be turnt" and, uh, "Toledo weather gonna be v lit during testing week."

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Dustin Nelson is a Senior Writer on the news team at Thrillist. Follow him @dlukenelson.