Don't let the small stature of competitive eater Matt "Megatoad" Stonie fool you. This guy can eat a bewildering amount of food and does it professionally. He's ranked second in the world among Major League Eating's competitors. (Yes, that's a real thing.) Stonie was the winner of the 2015 Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest, the most storied event to ever happen in America on July 4.
Stonie is making a couple of videos in celebration of hitting two million subscribers on his YouTube channel and the first of them deserves the subtitle "The Jim Gaffigan Challenge." Stonie sits down and houses 34 Hot Pockets in less than 30 minutes. If you ever feel greasy and gross after eating a microwave meal, you can now be glad you don't feel like he does at the end of this video.
That gluttonous pile of Hot Pockets equals 10,720 calories and 9.6 pounds of food, plated out in front in 11 gourmet flavors that he reviews as he moves through the microwaved forest of flash frozen ham.
If that's the kind of thing that makes you hungry, check out Stonie take down 113 pancakes in eight minutes, 12 tacos in one minute, or 25 Big Macs in 22 minutes.