5. Arizona Cardinals - .062 BAC
Pretty sure the presented data is based on this dude alone.
4. Cleveland Browns - .064 BAC
If you were a Browns fan, or even just lived in Cleveland, you'd be drinking right now, too.
3. Philadelphia Eagles - .069 BAC
Remember, these are the fans that nearly killed Santa and cheer when opposing players get hurt. At least they have an excuse for being mean. I guess.
2. Detroit Lions - .069 BAC
See: Browns, Cleveland.
1. Buffalo Bills - .076 BAC
It's cold. The team sucks. You lost four straight Superbowls. Rex Ryan is your coach. Look, if you want to drink copiously, go ahead -- if anyone deserves it, it's Bills fans.
Wil Fulton is a Staff Writer for Thrillist. He's proud the Giants made this list, in a weird way. And also the rich. Follow him @wilfulton