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This Insane, 4-Story Go-Kart Track Is Like ‘Mario Kart’ IRL

As an unabashed Mario Kart fanatic, there's only so much simulating and imitating you can get away with before people start to look at you differently. But for those itching to skirt certain death and evade angry monsters via go-kart, the next best thing just might be the Niagara Speedway at Clifton Hill in Niagara Falls, Ontario. 

A four-story megastructure of twist, turns and semi-perilous bends, the track is the closest thing to a physical rendering of a Mario Kart track in North America. It's enough to pique the interest of any Nintendo-aficionado, even if you aren't concerned with Mario's nipples. According to Toronto's Daily Hive, the track is set to open in Spring 2018, and you can reasonably expect a mass exodus of go-karts lining up at the Canadian border around that time. 

While there are rules in place at the Niagara Speedway -- you won't total your friend's go-kart with a diabolically-placed banana -- you can still use your imagination. First-person video of the track (above), explains why fully-grown adults should jockey for elbow room on the course: 

"The Niagara Speedway is a marriage of traditional go-karts with the added fun and excitement of an elevated coaster styled track," the video's description reads. "Drivers get to test their driving skills along the straightaway, negotiate the hair-pin turns, and climb the elevated ramp as they head for the checkered flag."

While there's no official Mario Kart or Nintendo branding associated with the yet to be opened track, you can head to Japan for this kitschy go-kart tour of Tokyo, where costumes are encouraged. The Niagara Speedway's opening date is still unconfirmed, but in the meantime you should probably brush up on your driving skills.

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Sam Blum is a News Staff Writer for Thrillist. He's also a martial arts and music nerd who appreciates a fine sandwich and cute dogs. Find his clips in The Guardian, Rolling Stone, The A.V. Club and Esquire. He's on Twitter @Blumnessmonster.