In an event closely mirroring the smoke and chaos of Fyre Festival, only with more pizza, a company in the United Kingdom has apologized for failing to deliver on it's promise of an all-you-can-eat pizza utopia at the Notting Hill Pizza Festival last weekend.
Self-described "high-end luxury lifestyle brand" Bellmonte Life organized the ill-fated event, promising attendees "a pizza for every palette," but instead the company delivered long lines, empty stomachs, and dashed dreams. People who flocked to the event wound up waiting for hours, only to get one or two sad slices of melty, gooey cheese bread. The admission price was £15, or roughly $20. The paltry offerings weren't even appetizing: one attendee said the minimal pizza available "looked like something that had already passed through a cat's digestive system," per a BBC report.
Bellmonte Life apologized for the snafu, citing small ovens that broke under the stress of rabid demand. Even so, the company wasn't exactly humble about its shortcomings, writing in a statement that "overzealous appetites" ultimately made the festival a disaster.
“Despite the best efforts of our team preparing the pizzas in the smaller ovens, the flow of pizzas was slower than intended," the company said. "In contrast to claims that there were not enough pizzas, this was not the case. Our team was hard at work to ensure that everyone was able to sample pizzas. However, it was unfortunate that the queues grew due to some overzealous appetites, preventing others to be able to enjoy the food.”
Luckily, for posterity's sake, attendees aired their grievances on Twitter, and according to photos of the long, miserable lines, it doesn't appear that anyone was "able to enjoy the food."