This past weekend, two Amish men in Geauga County, Ohio, packed some spiked iced teas and strapped a 12-pack of beer of Michelob Ultra to the roof of their horse-drawn buggy. The carriage had a stereo system with not-so-neighborhood-friendly speakers. The day of rest was young, and it was theirs. Until the cops tried to pull them over for drinking and driving a horse.
A deputy was on parol Sunday morning when he saw the mobile party and attempted to question the two men. But when The Amish Boys set out to rage, The Amish Boys won't be stopped. So, instead of complying, the two quickly ran into nearby woods, and the horse ran away like a self-operating getaway car.
The time their party began is unknown. But it seems from the amount of beer packed into the car that it wasn't stopping anytime soon.
Fox 8 Cleveland reported that younger members of the Amish community often "experiment with influences from the outside world," but that authorities in the county still have a duty to enforce the law. Now the men have both the Lord and the authorities on their backs.
Chief Deputy Joe Dragovich told Fox 8 Cleveland that he's never operated an Amish buggy with a horse, but he's been told that horses will know the way home even if nobody is leading them.
"And that horse went a little further down the road and onto an oil-gas well-road and stopped," he said. A crucial contribution to the escape.
When the cop caught up, he surveyed the scene. A beer can was crushed. The beer on the roof sat guiltily. The horse had a Poker face.
The cop had the buggy towed and the horse sent off to a farmer. Then it became a waiting game.
"Unfortunately, they're not licensed as far as the buggy goes," Dragovich said. "But it is a vehicle, it's on the roadway and the laws do apply." AKA you can't drink and drive a horse. Is there no exception for people who dedicate their lives to resisting worldly temptation?
Nope. And if the men are caught, they may be charged with failure to comply. Next time, stay in one place and call a horse-drawn Uber, boys.