Like a zombified high school acquaintance you didn't stay in touch with, Pirates of the Caribbean has risen from the dead and looks vaguely familiar. Determined to buckle your swashes once every few years, Pirates of the Caribbean returns with Dead Men Tell No Tales, the fifth installment in the film franchise based on a theme park ride.
While it feels awfully familiar, the trailer holds back on the franchise's most familiar face. Johnny Depp, who has floated the series for 13 years, is nowhere to be found. Instead, you get two minutes of the most expensive looking cliffs you've ever seen. It opens on cliffs. Then offers you more cliffs. Then there's a person, and they hear something strange! Is it the cliffs? Better take a look!
When the trailer isn't giving CGI fans a buffet o' cliffs — with a side of look at all these shadows! — it provides a first look at Cap'n Jack Sparrow's newest foe, Captain Salazar, played by Javier Bardem. In his brief moment between shots of cliffs, Salazar gushes thick black bile and issues a very kind threat to Sparrow's life. Then, of course, there are more cliffs.
The film brings back Depp, Orlando Bloom (who wasn't in 2011's On Stranger Tides), and Geoffrey Rush. It will also introduce some new faces to the world of pirating, including Bardem, Paul McCartney (really), Kaya Scodelario and David Wenham.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales will saunter into theaters on May 27, 2017.