Reynolds Wrap’s ‘Hunger Harness’ Straps an Entire Buffet to Your Chest

reynolds wrap hunger harness 2020
Courtesy of Reynolds Wrap

There's a moment in everyone's life where they realize they no longer care what anyone thinks. There's no pretense of being cool. You just do whatever the hell you want because who cares anymore? Why should I wash my hands after going to the bathroom, you might ask, when the world is on fire? This could be that watershed moment for many.

Reynolds Wrap debuted the Hunger Harness for last year's Super Bowl. The portable buffet table is back and much larger. The Hunger Harness harnesses the power of laziness and straps an entire meal's worth of food directly to your body so you can keep eating and never stand up.

Here's what you get: There's a thermal pouch on the front because you definitely don't want the sandwich or wings you put there to get cold. There's a food tray that plops down into your lap so so you have a place for that slice of pizza or tater skin. Under the tray is a paper towel dispenser becuase you're not an animal. There's also an insulated dip holder and a thermal drink holder.

Bonus: The new version also has a trash can pouch for all your mangled chicken bones and greasy napkins. There's a straw that runs through the harness so you don't have to use your hands to get a drink. And the cherry on top is a detachable neck pillow in case you need a quick rest before you start back in on those waffle fries.

reynolds wrap hunger harness
Look at this dude just using a plate like he doesn't know the Hunger Harness exists. | Courtesy of Reynolds Wrap

The conversation starter is available now for $3.99, the same amount it costs to by a tube of actual Reynolds Wrap. Your life will never be the same. 

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Dustin Nelson is a Senior Staff Writer at Thrillist. Follow him @dlukenelson.