A Sausage Egg and Cheese Is Better Than a Bacon Egg and Cheese and I Will Tell You Why
Now that McDonald’s has revealed its sausage and egg McMuffin recipe, I'm revealing my truth.
When McDonald’s UK released its recipe for the sausage and egg McMuffin earlier this month, it was kind of hilarious -- requiring a skill set marginally more sophisticated than twisting open an Oreo or tapping into a Bota Box. Making the McMuffin at home would resemble building more than cooking. But for me, the recipe was personal.
And here it is before we get to the conceit of this piece -- just so recipe Twitter doesn’t yell at me.
You will need:
- 1 English muffin
- 75g sausage meat (a sausage-sized sausage patty is fine)
- 2 eggs (sounds like a lotta eggs but OK)
- 1 slice of American cheese (sounds like not enough cheese but OK)
Then, you know, you cook everything and put it together. Cheese goes on the bottom.
I live in New York City, which is home to many marvelous and famous foodstuffs. Among them: the bacon, egg, and cheese. Everybody loves a BEC. It’s one of our preeminent hangover-slayers. You can order it in every borough without explanation or instruction unless you’re getting it on a stupid bagel. But its reign of prominence over the objectively superior sausage, egg, and cheese has gone on for too long and must end. The breakfast experts at McDonald’s didn’t release a bacon, egg, and cheese recipe, now did they? No. Because a sausage, egg, and cheese is better than a bacon, egg, and cheese and I will tell you why.
1.A sausage, egg, and cheese handles better. It is a tidy, contained unit. It, is, in fact, the Platonic ideal of a sandwich, one in which everything is bound together, unlike a BEC where you’ve got strips of bacon sliding all over the place, making you, the taxpaying consumer, look like some kinda chump from a ‘90s infomercial.
2. It has the perfect ingredient-to-bite ratio. Thanks to the above very good point, which proves that the sausage, egg, and cheese is nature’s most harmonious sandwich, you’re getting every flavor every time you take a bite.
3. It holds its heat better. This is also due to the sausage, egg, and cheese’s construction. It’s packed tight, preventing exposure to the elements and premature cooling. A BEC allows interior air space, which leads to a sad, room-temperature sandwich journey for you.
4. A sausage, egg, and cheese is more consistent. Bacon can vary wildly, even if you’re getting your breakfast from the same bodega every morning. Sometimes it's extra crispy, sometimes it's chewy and limp. Sausage is... what it is. That's why you don’t want to see how it’s made.
5. It's probably keeping the American cheese industry afloat. Why is American cheese so maligned? Is it the color? The individually-wrapped presentation? It's a good cheese. Especially when it's melted onto a sausage patty.
Now that you are convinced, as we enter the “weekend,” or, breakfast’s finest hour, I invite you to wonder how we got here. How did the BEC unfairly snatch the spotlight from its better, the sausage, egg, and cheese, for generations? Actually, I’ll just tell you: “bacon, egg, and cheese” just sounds better. It pains me a little to have to trisect it on the page. It should rightfully be one word, just as it sounds: beggineggncheese.
This is the sausage, egg, and cheese’s only failing; it is less lyrical than the wrongfully famed BEC. But the time for such superficial preferences has passed. Tomorrow morning, eschew those pretty syllables and, from an appropriate social distance, order up a sausage, egg, and cheese.
Or make the McDonald’s sausage and egg McMuffin at home, that looks good, too.