In the off-chance that you need yet another reason to believe spiders are terrifying eight-legged monsters, look no further than an extremely unlucky Australian man who claims a spider bit his penis while sitting on a toilet. For the second damn time. Seriously.
The 21-year-old tradesman from Sydney, Australia, who would only go by "Jordan" in news reports, said he was sitting on a portable toilet, when he felt a painful sting on his dick and looked down to see spider legs dangling near his junk. As if this story wasn't bad enough, it turns out the incident was actually the second time a spider has bitten his penis while using a portable restroom. And although he wasn't able to identify the type of spider that bit him this time, a highly venomous redback spider bit him in the first incident, according to a report by BBC News. Yikes.
As you can imagine, Jordan refrained from using portable toilets after the first spider bite, but took the risk of using one again after assuming it was safe.