News

This Company Will Pay You $10K to Poop for 3 Months. Seriously.

No, really, this company wants to pay someone to talk about their poops.

tushy pooping job
Shutterstock.com

This is not the job for you if you can't be bothered to give a crap about work.

Tushy, a company concerned butts by way of eco-friendly bamboo toilet paper, bidets, and stools, is looking to hire someone for a three-month gig that pays $10,000. It's part of its ongoing campaign to "make bidets mainstream" in the US. The VP of Fecal Matters position is temporary, but, still, you've been pooping for free all these years. It's hard to pass up turning your toilet into a home office.

"For many Americans, getting paid to poop is purely aspirational," Jason Ojalvo, CEO of Tushy, said in a statement. "Our new VP of Fecal Matters will serve as the change we wish to see in every bathroom and should be ready to sit down and stand up for revolutionizing the way people poop."

The application page is so loaded with crap puns that it can be tougher to sift through than cat litter after vacation. However, to apply for the poo-sition (my apologies), you'll need to be a pooping individual of at least 21 years of age. There's also work to be done. It's not just a bunch of farting around. You'll be "studying" your bathroom habits while working from your home throne. You'll also have to be comfortable sharing what usually happens behind closed doors with the company and the general public on social media. Making videos, interviewing friends and family members about their squats, and testing bathroom products from Tushy and other companies are all part of the gig as well.

The application is due by July 7, and requires a short video about why your butt is the butt for the job. You do not have to present your qualifications to the melody of a Sir Mix-a-Lot song, but one imagines that you won't lose points for doing that. The top candidates will be interviewed by Tushy a week later, with just one taking their seat about the throne. It's probably the most money you'll make going #2. Plus, it's not like you weren't going to poop anyhow. You've got nothing to lose.

Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email and subscribe here for our YouTube channel to get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.

Dustin Nelson is a Senior Staff Writer at Thrillist. Follow him @dlukenelson.