AutoMotivator

Motivational posters featuring soaring eagles and fearless rock climbers work great for tricking your bosses into thinking you try, but what does Skymall know about what actually fires up your spirit? Get personalized inspiration, with the AutoMotivator.

AM helps you create encouraging posters whose format precisely mimics the industry standard -- picture, noble quality, pat platitude -- except the options you choose can be not-for-smug-idiots. They've got a library of photos, but best results begin with uploading a pic from your computer or the web -- the possibilities are only limited by your office's firewall/your willingness to be caught Google Imaging "monkey drinking own pee". Next, compose a short title d'encouragement, and a longer subtitle of corresponding faux-wisdom; both'll show up in the exact fonts the real deals use, making the farce so airtight, people might start to believe that Kurt Russell is indeed The Daring Inventor of Bacon.

When done, save your masterpiece on Flickr, ImageShack, or your computer, then print out copies and position on co-workers' desks. Your boss'll applaud the camaraderie, while John from Marketing'll just weep, as his holiday-party make-out session is now immortalized alongside the warning, "Booze: It Didn't Make Everyone Else Blind".