While specialty watches can present you with useless information like altitude/moon phases/the time, they rarely do much to actually facilitate your existence. To realize the full potential inherent in gears and hands, check out Mr. Jones Watches.
Crafted by an actual Mr. Jones, the three just-re-released MJWs offer analog displays that inform your everyday experience, housed in attractive stainless steel casings married to leather straps (reminiscent of your stash of DeLorean bondage videos). The Decider's face is ringed by 30 slots that switch synchronously from "Yes" to "No" with each passing second, like a Magic 8-ball for the absolutist. The hour hand on the Mantra is a rotating wedge that reveals 24 messages designed to either inspire greatness ("Live Your Dreams") or mercilessly crush your spirit ("Nobody Likes You"), kind of like your high-school gym teacher, only it still functions when you take away its coffee mug of bourbon.