Revenge Tactics

Whether you get cheated on, back-stabbed, or screwed over, getting even with passive-aggression is beneath a man of your distinction. Here are some aggressive-aggressive ways to exact your revenge.Wipe Yourself Clean:PrintedTp.com These geniuses will happily screen print a photo of your heartless ex or idiot boss onto a roll of toilet paper. Unlike other novelty stores, you can actually use PTP's personalized rolls. It's not the softest (think highway rest stop quality), but poop-facing those you loathe the most is worth the temporary discomfort.Chip-in-a-Box:JeremyInc.com or send Jeremy an emailFor a small fee, Jeremy Rupke will box up a dried piece of cow crap from his Canadian farm and anonymously ship it off to whomever you want. Great for those who lack the motivation to steal their own dung or purchase a cow to produce it. Web Pain:RevengeWorld.com (NSFW)Get an RW homepage and upload those provocative photos of your ex you SWORE you'd never reveal. Type your message about how the alleged tramp wronged you and RW's extremely active (and bitter) online community will not only support you, but completely rip her apart. This is a cruel forum, so it's best used for ex-girlfriends who did something really awful, like, say, have sex with your best friend on top of a picture of your nana while insulting your dead childhood dog.