Price Protectr

The "low-price guarantee" is one of those things that can definitely save you money, but that no one bothers taking advantage of -- like dry-cleaning coupons and condoms. Buck that trend and get your cash back with Price Protectr. PP's a free service that aggregates price info from major online retailers (Amazon, Best Buy, Circuit City, Target) to instantly let you know when you're entitled to sweet rebate action. Just submit the URL for any items you buy, and if one of them goes on sale -- be it an MP3 player, digital camera, or hauntingly erotic Lizzie McGuire DVD -- you'll get an email alert. This idiot-proof process not only results in money back down the road, it also gives you greater confidence to purchase consumer products today -- knowing that even if you feel ashamed paying for a USB-powered Pleasure Pocket from Vagine-Tek, you won't have to feel the life-like pain of overpaying. In January alone, PP has alerted users to $40,000 worth of price differences -- enough for them to share a used Lexus. So order that big-ass TV for Sunday's game, and relax safe in the knowledge that its price is being tracked -- leaving you nothing to worry about except rumpled dress shirts, VD, and bastard children.