I Park Like An Idiot

The only thing worse than not finding a parking spot is finding half a spot -- so reduced because some jackass has one tire over the line and one on the curb. Let the bastard know where he stands with an "I Park Like An Idiot" bumper sticker.From the Chicagoan geniuses behind those Threadless.com humping unicorn tees, IPLAI stickers are another example of the collective's commitment to big, bright, bold statements -- whether they be about bad driving skills or magical animal sex. Conceived during an idle daydream, this yellow sticker's emblazoned with words of justified self-disclosure along with a depiction of a classic, diagonal-across-two-spots jerk parking move. IParkLikeAnIdiot.com disingenuously advises against stickering other people's cars, so here are a few vehicles you should "not" slap with an IPLAI:

  • Crashed Hilton-esque celebriwhore-mobiles projecting from a storefront window, or gasless in front of a shrub
  • Big cars spilling corpulently over the limited space of compact spots
  • SUVs too big for the limited space of the planet
  • Fertilizer-scented vans parked outside street markets and federal buildings

To inspire your vigilante metermaiding, IPLAI has filled its website chock full of photos of notably egregious parking jobs. Submit your own handiwork and you could achieve coveted public approval of your very legitimate disapproval -- or web-based shame if the shot showcases your own bestickered, beater Kia double parked in front of a doughnut shop.