Although cigars are inextricably linked to manly celebrations of accomplishment, no one wants to befoul his home with the putrid fumes of old stogies. So before you again befoul the streets, or the homes of others, arm yourself with the Cigar Lover's Kit.
The CLK includes all the equipment for Cuban/Dominican/Swisher joy in a compact hardwood package about the size of Lunchables (this one significantly less likely to contain radioactive ham). Just slide out the drawer to reveal a nickel-plated butane torch, steel cutter, and a removable nickel-plated ashtray -- because no matter where you are, you should never have to bite fibrous hunks off your Macanudo, struggle with deli matches, or ash into a Big Gulp.
Because this is only $50, even the most irregular smoker deserves one. All that's missing is the cigar, so when a puff is upon you, you can keep your place smelling like Febreze while enjoying the finest accoutrements ever used to commemorate the rolled newspaper execution of a really big spider.