Sweating can be the natural result of a rise in body temperature, an increase in stress, or the eating of a double Six Dollar Burger. Rather than surrendering to drippy inevitability, buy a shirt from the new designer EST.1887ag. Made in Santa Monica by former cotton farmer David Hayes, EST.1887ag makes tees specially designed to regulate body temperature, kill bacteria, neutralize ammonia, and generally keep you from smelling like a fetid man-dumpster. They accomplish this onerous mission through the use of a textile made of 95% cotton, 5% silver -- a blend that, despite your fears, won't alert metal detectors or marauding pirates. Additionally, EST's shirts are pit-stain resistant -- though this claim was made based on the average man's pits, and not those of one who spends his weekends watching bowling and eating wheels of cheese. You can enjoy this shirty technology in both short and long-sleeves, as well as tank tops -- which, despite the space-age material, will still result in heavy sweating as you realize that everyone who sees you wants to throw you into an open sewer.