Just because we're celebrating the birth of our free nation tomorrow doesn't mean all you whack jobs out there can (or should) get away with carrying some of this crap onto a crowded airplane. That being said America, the stuff the TSA caught you with this week is freaking hilarious.
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5. Guns. Lots of Guns. OK look, we get it. You're an All-American Badass. You walk softly, but carry a .357 Magnum should sh*t ever hit the fan. Maybe you even have a concealed weapons permit? Maybe the gun is such an extension of your own body that you don't even notice it anymore. Fine Mr. Steven Segall, but there's one place you can't bring it, and that's on a F*CKING PLANE.
4. A ton of fake grenades Do you own an army surplus store? Do you just love the idea of delaying the entire flight because you decided to strap a diffused grenade to your trench coat and cruise through a metal detector? Are you insane? If you answered yes to any or all of these questions and felt totally cool bringing a formerly active grenade into an airport, we need to talk.
2. A literal Claymore antipersonnel mine What? How? Who? If you've seen or held an actual claymore mine in the past few years, either you're in the armed forces, or have taken your Call Of Duty fetish just a bit too far. Our money is on the latter.
1. Three different concealed sword canes Our hat goes off to you, aging badass who thinks he can get away with bringing a concealed sword on a regional AirTran flight. Please pick up your membership card to the League Of Extraordinary Gentleman on your way out.