As you prepare to sip egg nog until your pants no longer fit, it's important to reflect on all the ridiculous stuff you've gotten away with this year. This holiday season, thank your friends and family for putting up with your bullsh*t with high-quality gifts they won't want to return.
We tell you the best things to eat, drink, and do. Now we're telling you the best things to buy for everyone on your list, with prices ranging from $ to $$$. This is the stuff that'll have your crew looking better, living funner, and generally, being awesomer. You're about to go down in gift-giving history, so get shoppin'.
You and your buds have real jobs and adult responsibilities, but that doesn't mean you're "grown ups", necessarily. You're the guy who knows how to entertain, and your gifts shouldn't disappoint. Pick up any in this group and they definitely won't.
Dark Side of the Mom, right? Gift this to the guy who still has an Oedipal complex.
Boring guys have boring clocks. Gift this to the bro who's as badass as a fighter pilot, but bombs at being on time.
For the friend who's still dumb enough to open bottles with his teeth, an easy to use, cap-eating monster will save him a few dental bills.
Knowing a boatload about alcohol is basically required by law. Gift this to your favorite drinking buddy to make Thirsty Thursdays more educational.
For the guy who's been on a million first dates, this burn-by-the-hour candle might finally land him a second one.
Grabbing a drink with Bill Murray is any rational human's dream. Let your friend drink in the company of a Hollywood great, and don't worry if the conversation is a little one-sided.
Sleek, geometric pewter animal heads and black ceramic hardly look like drinking vessels at all, so you can rip shots and keep your dignity intact (...maybe).
Give your roommate a candle to mask the stinking mound of socks hiding in his room. Consider it a gift for both of you.
You've got a friend who still uses his high school backpack and buys five-buck watches that break after a week because he very incorrectly thinks he's saving money. He's being an idiot. Durable, must-have goods are failsafe when it comes to buying gifts, whether it's for your brother or your brother from another mother. Or maybe even your mother.
You can't make a real pourover without a thin-spout kettle. Gift this to turn your buds into coffee aficionados (if they aren't already) and make their morning routines twice as good.
Bare walls are for boring people. Gift this to your roommate and consider it a present for the both of you.
Nobody likes commuting, but good headphones and killer jams can make it better. Gift your bro the earbuds; he can buy his own music.
For the guy who uses a gross gym duffel on weekend getaways, a handsome bag like this will get him to grow the hell up.
Nothing says "adult" more than a sleek, minimal, award-winning clock, even if you're still using old bedsheets from college [or dare we say high school].
Allow your bro to reap the benefits of botanicals smoke-free and on-the-go with a Snoop-approved vaporizer.
For the coffee snob or the guy you can't be around unless he's hooked up to an IV of java, a drip pot that makes the cleanest, more flavorful pourover ever is the ideal gift.
For the craft beer enthusiast, a 64-ounce growler (aka a five-drink capacity) will make brewery tours and picnics infinitely better.
Sure, you guys slummed it in college and are maybe still living in 500 square-foot apartments, but that shouldn't keep your friends from living in (semi-delusional) luxury. High-quality gear is guaranteed to make anyone look, feel, and live like a boss, so gift really nice gear to the guys you care about most.
A toy camera is like the anti-Instagram, but in the best possible way. Filter your photos the old fashioned way.
For the most carnivorous man you know.
For the guy who already has a heavy metal watch or two, a streamlined, military-inspired timepiece is the best way to switch up his wrist.
For the guy who's (maybe/probably) stuck in a dead-end job: this is literally our favorite leather messenger, and it'll either earn him a promotion or land him a better gig.
Crown your friend king of the dinner party by giving him a stainless steel champagne sabre. Then pop bottles like a motherf*cking ninja.
A man can't pull off Wedding Crashers-style debauchery without a good suit. This weekender's built-in garment bag guarantees he'll be wrinkle-free and at peak handsomeness.
This blanket makes even the sketchiest, dirtiest, stoop sale-find couch feel like a luxurious slice o' heaven.
Change your earbud-using friend's life with a pair of over-the-ear headphones that are sexy as hell and might score him a date on his way to work.