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Two In The Shirt

What you wear reflects your innermost desires, whether it's a power-suit screaming "I crave success", or a Tron suit screaming "I crave Jeff Bridges!" For clothes catering to what every man craves, grab Two In The Shirt.

Specializing in t-shirts depicting cheeky shots of nude/nearly nude women, Seattle-based T.I.T.S. has based their entire operation on the simple yet bold premise that "everyone wants sex", a profoundly more exciting truism than that behind their previous incarnation, "The Food, Shelter and Love Collection". The new holiday line trots out such uplifting numbers as Carol & Cheryl, on which said ladies are Santa-hatted while tongue-wrestling; Gifted, depicting the ultimate xxxmas morning, complete with strategically placed ribbons; and Twice As Nice, sporting a pair of seasonally lingerie'd hotties, perfect as Santa already knows you're a stone-coal pimp. More freshness includes Smoke (martini drinking girl blowing logo'd smoke rings), Umbrella (fortuitously long-haired brunette sucking on a fruitsicle) and Flawless, (girl w/ vividly hued lips and giant matching gemstone), thematically connected because "women with alcohol, women with fruit, and women with diamonds all just make sense"; also newly available are the vampiric True Blood, and Good Greens, depicting a hot, ganja-smoking golfer engaged in a game of putt, putt, give.

Future T.I.T.S. plans include collabs with Tera Patrick and local hip-hop crew Dyme Def; right now, they're also offering $100 gift certificates to the winners of their online sexy Halloween costume contest -- whoever wins just needs to remember to wash those lacy bits on Light Cycle.