Recipe

12 Breakfasts to Make for Someone the Morning After (You Did Sex)

Published On 11/05/2015 Published On 11/05/2015

However this person ended up in your bed -- a successful Tinder date, last-call eye contact -- is irrelevant to how you treat them once they're there. The proper thing to do the following morning is a) figure out their name, and then b) make them breakfast. We don't have any tips for the former, but we can certainly take care of the latter. We recommend you make one of these 12 breakfast dishes, all of which have been selected because they're creative, don't take long to make, and are easy to put together. Do this right and they might even want to bone you again!

Courtesy of Half Baked Harvest

Peanut butter & rhubarb jelly hot French toast sammie

By the time the person you met last night is done using your mouthwash and rifling through the prescriptions in your medicine cabinet, you will have completed Half Baked Harvest's 10-minute breakfast. Plus, rhubarb is a decidedly fancy and impressive jam. Recipe here!

Key ingredients:

  • Rhubarb
  • Peanut butter
  • Texas toast
  • Eggs

 

Egg white and avocado breakfast tostadas

Avocados and eggs go together probably better than you and whoever you took home at last call last night, but since you didn't give up then, there's no reason to now! Heap the egg scramble and avocado on a warm tortilla and top it all off with some salsa -- you just might get laid again after breakfast. Get that recipe

Key ingredients:

  • Eggs
  • Tortillas
  • Avocado
  • Salsa
Courtesy of Katie at the Kitchen Door

Apple pie oatmeal

Pie for breakfast is decadent and hedonistic, which is exactly the vibe you should go for. Plus, you can prepare this in the microwave, which will make you seem just the right amount of disinterested. Always keep them guessing! Here's the recipe

Key ingredients:

  • Oats
  • Apple
  • Almond butter
  • Skim milk

 

Blueberry coconut smoothie

Allow that person in your bed to think you're a regular Jamba Juice employee -- you could even role-play! "Here's your juice, ma'am," you'll say. And she'll be all, "I'm gonna juice you." You two are probably going to be better at role-playing than I am. Recipe here

  Key ingredients:

  • Frozen blueberries
  • Coconut milk
  • Coconut water
  • Vanilla protein powder
Courtesy of Life as a Strawberry

Breakfast bruschetta

Sure, it's simple, but there's something impressive about turning this appetizer into a legitimate breakfast. The best part about this recipe though, is that unlike typical bruschetta, it doesn't employ garlic or onions. Save eating those smelly bulbs for date five. Get the recipe

Key ingredients:

  • Baguette
  • Goat cheese
  • Eggs
  • Cherry tomatoes

 

Steamed asparagus with fried eggs and pecorino

There's something about shaving pecorino onto a dish that gives it a certain class (and by extension, you!), which is great if you want to make your sex date forget all about how much you drooled all over your pillow. Also, it's only four ingredients, so, small investment, big payoff here. Here's the recipe

Key ingredients:

  • Asparagus
  • Eggs
  • Pecorino cheese
  • Olive oil
Courtesy of How Sweet It Is

Quinoa breakfast skillet

Like the time you tried to introduce Greek yogurt in the bedroom, this dish is a mix of healthy, naughty, and a little weird -- there's both quinoa and bacon, which cancel each other out health-wise, I'm pretty sure. If Whole Foods had a 24-hour diner, this recipe would be on the menu. 

Key ingredients:

  • Quinoa
  • Bacon
  • Sweet potato
  • Eggs

 

Mini egg and cheese tortilla cups

They're handheld, which means you can eat 'em in bed with one hand, leaving your other hand free to do... whatever. Get it? Like, sexy things to the person you slept with last night. Recipe here.

Key ingredients:

  • Eggs
  • Shredded cheese
  • Bell peppers
  • Tortillas
Drew Swantak/Thrillist

Bacon nigiri

Think ahead and buy this magical ingredient called "egg crepe." With it you can make this super-easy, crazy-creative morning meal. And then afterwards they'll roll around with you in the sack. Sushi pun! Yessss.

Key ingredients:

  • Bacon
  • Texas toast
  • Egg crepe
  • Absolutely nothing else

 

Five-minute egg breakfast sandwich

The Little Kitchen's recipe correctly assumes you have five minutes to spare to make this. Which is crazy, because that's four minutes and 30 seconds longer than sex takes! Right, guys?! Anyone? 

Key ingredients:

  • Eggs
  • Baby spinach
  • Cheddar cheese
  • English muffins
Drew Swantak/Thrillist

Breakfast cereal cookies

Our very own recipes editor Perry Santanachote invented these breakfast cookies expressly to get you laid, and they shockingly only take a half-hour to make. And according to my math, that's 29 minutes and 30 seconds longer than sex takes! Why is no one with me on this? 

Key ingredients:

  • Flour
  • Rolled oats
  • Eggs
  • Breakfast cereal

 

Easy cheesy spinach frittata

Anyone can serve someone scrambled eggs, but offering the person you freaked a frittata is way more spectacular. And the best part about The Indolent Cook's recipe is that it takes less work than cooking eggs on the stovetop -- the oven does the heavy lifting for you in 15 minutes. 

Key ingredients:

  • Greek yogurt
  • Eggs
  • Shredded cheddar
  • Baby spinach

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Lee Breslouer is a senior writer for Thrillist, and loves both eggs and avocados with all his heart. Follow him to better breakfasts: @LeeBreslouer.

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