Philly cheesesteak lasagna is here to make you fat

Philly Cheesesteak Lasagna
Drew Swantak
Drew Swantak

Youse want dat wit whiz or provolone? Too bad, you're getting both.

Our beautifully artery-endangering Philly cheesesteak lasagna makes room for five layers of sharp provolone and tangy Cheez Whiz to drip through sheets of juicy roast beef, peppers, caramelized onions, and sautéed mushrooms (because why the hell not).

This beast is easier to make than one of those puzzles with the plastic handles on the pieces, where the giraffe just goes in the hole that looks exactly like a giraffe, and also just happens to be the best use of lasagna noodles we've found so far. Although we're definitely going to keep searching.

Wit whiz AND provolone. Because mortality is a rumor.
Drew Swantak

Philly Cheesesteak Lasagna Recipe

Total Time: 1 hour
Yield: 1 (9-by-13-inch) pan

INGREDIENTS:
  • 2 tablespoons olive oil, divided
  • 2 medium yellow onions, halved and sliced thin
  • 2 teaspoons kosher salt, divided
  • 1 pound cremini mushrooms, sliced
  • 2 poblano peppers, sliced thin
  • 2 cubanelle peppers, sliced thin
  • 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
  • 12 wavy lasagna noodles
  • 2 pounds cooked roast beef, sliced thin
  • 12 slices sharp provolone
  • 1 (15-ounce) jar Cheez Whiz
  • 1 cup freshly grated aged provolone
DIRECTIONS:
  • Preheat oven to 350°F.
  • Heat a large Dutch oven or wok over medium heat. Add 1 tablespoon olive oil and heat until shimmering. Add onions and sauté until soft. Sprinkle 1 teaspoon salt over them and cook until they just start to brown, about 10 minutes. Add mushrooms, peppers, and remaining 1 teaspoon salt. Turn heat to high and sauté for 8-10 minutes or until all the juices have released and evaporated. Turn off heat and stir in black pepper.
  • Boil 2 quarts of water in a large pot and cook lasagna noodles for 4 minutes. Drain and transfer to a large bowl. Toss with olive oil so the noodles don't stick together.
  • Layer noodles side by side with edges overlapping in 9-by-13-inch baking pan. Stack 1 pound of roast beef evenly over the noodles. Lay 6 slices of provolone over the beef. Top with half of the mushroom-onion-pepper mixture. Spread half the Cheez Whiz on top. Repeat layers once more. To finish, spread out the remaining noodles and top with grated provolone.
    Bake for 30 minutes.
  • Let this beast sit for 15 minutes before cutting into it.
Philly Cheesesteak Lasagna
Drew Swantak