Dare to scratch below the surface of these fanciful tales and you just might find the best Thrillist piece of the year, or Richard Sandrak. Happy Holidays; we'll see you in '09.
Food/Drink: Close your eyes, and you'll see 2008 was a giant masterpiece, especially if you thought 2007 was totally the pits.
Culture: San Franciscans got a sweet tradition from zee Germans while they sat on a splendiferous throne, failing to appreciate their own mixed metaphors.
Gear: Unfashionable convicts were offered a stylish reprieve before reverting to the second-hand jumpers they scored from their boys back home.
Gadgets: Technology became able to navigate you through the nasty web of lies spun by the craftiest insects.
Services: You got some help with that insatiable lust for froyo, and a whole lot of dangerous guidance, from a man-boy among men.
Events: If you attended any of this year's tasty tastelessness, you probably got all banged up, but still experienced the rush of 100% pure adrenaline.