Sex Tips for Boring People: Losing a Testicle, Sex Frequency, and Creepily Dating Younger People
Sex Tips for Boring People will take your sex life from vanilla to passion fruit. Or at least from vanilla to vanilla bean. Find more sexy advice right here and be sure to leave your questions in the comments!
What happens to your body after you lose a testicle?
Nothing. No, but seriously. Nothing. I don’t mean to minimize this, as I know for men the idea of losing a testicle means the loss of manhood. (FYI guys: ladies don’t really care whether you have one or two -- not really the area we focus on... but we get why it bothers YOU.) But if you have to have a testicle removed for whatever reason, be it cancer, trauma, or injury, biologically your body will be just fine.
Most of the time, the remaining testicle produces enough testosterone and sperm to compensate for the testicle that has been removed, according to doctors over at the International Society for Sexual Medicine. So worry not! You’ll still be able to hump like the best of them and father all the children you want, should you so choose.
How often do most couples have sex?
This is kind of an impossible target to quantify, since every couple is entirely different, and in today’s day lines of sexual “normalcy” are so blurred. You have heterosexual monogamous couples, heterosexual swingers, bisexual monogamous couples, homosexual monogamous couples... you see where I’m going with this. But for the sake of the argument let’s assume we’re talking about heterosexual, monogamous couples. It’s still a tough question to answer because Bob and Sue might screw like bunnies, while Ted and Alice schedule Monday evening sex.
The common conception is, obviously, couples who have more sex are happier. I mean, why WOULDN’T endless orgasms be the markings of a successful relationship? But a study conducted by Carnegie Mellon last May says that’s not necessarily so. The study split 64 couples with various sexual frequencies into two groups. Group A kept their sex lives the same, while Group B was instructed to have twice as much sex as usual. By the end of the study, Group B showed a decline in energy and enthusiasm for sex. The bottom line? Couples should have as much sex as feels normal to them, without feeling forced.
So if the root of this question is that you don’t feel you’re having enough sex with your partner, or perhaps the frequency is too much for you, that’s something you should bring up with them. Unfortunately, science can’t help with this one.
What is an acceptable age gap for couples?
While you shouldn’t let society dictate what is or isn’t “normal,” there is definitely a serious ick factor that needs to be taken into consideration when it comes to age gaps. Personally, I am of the belief that if it’s not hurting anyone and it works for you, then embrace it. But if visions of Mary Kay Letourneau dance in your head, that might be cause for concern.
First and foremost, all participants should be of legal age. But hopefully that’s a given. Generally speaking, if you partner is old enough to have given birth to you, that’s probably too wide of a gap -- but it all depends on what age you are when you meet and fall in love. A 40-year-old with a 60-year-old is way less off-putting than an 18-year-old and a 38-year-old.
"Age will always stir the pot in terms of interest," says Dr. Judy Scheel, PhD, LCSW, author, and national speaker. "It’s hard not to assign a value to age. With that said, people are motivated by different things when they fall in love. Whenever there is a subordinate role, or a role where the intent on either party is to use the other person in some way, take advantage of them, or put them in a victimized role, that is a red flag. Generally if the age of one partner is 21 or younger and the other partner is more than 10 years older, that is suspect."
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Meagan Drillinger is a contributing writer for Thrillist. All of her dates are tax deductible. Follow her on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook at @drillinjourneys.