You forgot to take it slow
A lot of guys are all about instant gratification. But patience is key when it comes to pleasing a woman, speed demon. The average guy only needs five or six minutes to take care of business. A women can take up to 30 (see problem #2). This irritating inequity of arousal is known as the orgasm gap, and it is one of the largest obstacles that couples face on the road to simultaneous O’s.
If you have any hope of bridging this gap, you need to slow everything down when it’s time to get down. A good rule of thumb is to go three times slower than you normally would. Prolong the make-out sessions, slowly undress her, and get to know those other erogenous zones before you delve into her nether regions. Once the sex begins, don’t start hammering away like you’re tenderizing a steak (trust me, she’s already tender). Instead, try moving together at a slow and steady pace. It might not feel natural at first, but it will absolutely help you last longer, thereby giving her more time to cross that orgasmic finish line.
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Dr. Emily Morse is a sex and relationship expert, host of the top-downloaded podcast Sex with Emily, and star of Bravo TV’s Miss Advised. She also wants all women to have orgasms every single time. Follow her on Twitter: @SexWithEmily.