And don’t do that. Don’t cover for your girlfriend and insist you’re there for the roller coasters -- that’s a lie bigger than the guy who ran over your foot with his motor scooter by the Dippin’ Dots stand. I’m a front-row Kingda Ka veteran; and if you two are true adrenaline junkies, Space Mountain and Runaway Train won’t cut it because they don’t go upside down. You’re better off thrill-seeking at a Six Flags in New Jersey. These are facts.
This is your traveling prime time! You’re both young and spritely enough to actively explore new places, yet mature enough to appreciate their uniqueness (especially since you now have the money to do so -- sort of). Your hangovers aren’t too vicious yet, so a day of cultural sightseeing is still doable after a night of moderate-to-heavy imbibing. Essentially, you’re in the process of adulting, but you’re not full-on grown-ups whose 5-year-old twins in matching footsy pajamas are screeching, “WE WANNA SEE MICKEY!!” You’ll have that, a pair of Tevas, and a midlife crisis to look forward to 10 years from now.
Until then, round-trip flights to Charleston are down to $260 on Kayak -- no Mickey Mouse ears required. You’re welcome.
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Brooke Sager is a contributing writer for Thrillist who had the time of her life at Disney World... when she was 8. Follow her mostly mature adventures that didn’t happen in Orlando on Instagram and Twitter: @HIHEELZbrooke.