I’ve been in an obnoxiously happy relationship for 15 years. I try not to be an asshole about it, so I don’t go around giving advice or writing something asshole-y like “Lessons I’ve Learned From Being Happily Married, Not That You Would Know You Sad, Pitiable, Single Who Will Likely Have Your Dead Face Eaten By Your Pet.” But occasionally, a non-attached person will ask my advice about someone that he or she is dating. Often, I start with this disclaimer: “Anyone who has ever given you relationship advice is full of bullshit.”
Every relationship is different
It’s true. Human beings are invariably different, each and every one of ’em, and driven by thousands of experiences, beliefs, and behaviors. Generalized advice just doesn’t pan out most of the time. For instance, that “Don’t go to bed angry” shit would have resulted in my divorce. I need time to breathe when I’m angry or else I lash out like a heavy-footed she-beast.