Love handles and all
Here's the thing no one tells you about being in love: you get really, really comfortable. It's like, 10% fireworks and that sensation of jumping off a cliff but you like it (?!?!) and 90% feeling super, deeply, profoundly comfortable in your own skin and sweatpants. The drive to make an effort shrinks almost entirely, and suddenly the idea of never putting on mascara again isn't so crazy.
If you feel the "real deal" is coming, take a good look at your beautifully lined lips right now and kiss them goodbye -- because they're about to be replaced with a rim of Cheetos dust and whatever hygiene drama comes with sharing a toothbrush.
When you're in love, you have a partner in crime to order Chinese food with after binge-drinking cheap wine all evening. You get someone who (through the power of love and passion) shares your same nap schedule. You have someone who splits Uber fares with you every time, totally eliminating the calories you used to burn on your regular commute. You have someone who loves, and I mean LOVES, garlic naan. Have you ever had garlic naan? It's fucking delicious and goes with everything.
I mean, have you ever tried leaving the warm comfort of your bed on a frigid winter day to go on a run, when a beautiful, sweet soul is big-spooning you and begging you to hit the snooze button? What are you going to do, say no? Are you a serial killer!? NO. YOU'RE NOT. YOU'RE GOING TO HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
You can go on a run when you're dead. That's the saying, right?