So I put one foot up and did what I thought was a casual lean. But all these families and their children were looking at me all judgey. I kind of looked like the men who sit outside dressing rooms waiting for their ladies, staring off, partly dead inside. Except I wasn’t. So I just looked out of place.
“Look away, young children, I’m growing a literal human being inside of me! Just let me rest on this easy to assemble bed from the SKOGSTA collection!”
I couldn’t focus on anything wonderfully IKEA-related because it felt like when you have a cold and you’re just so weak and lethargic and why meeeee! Everyone give me sympathy, dammit! After a pep talk with myself, I finally got up and rushed through the windowless store praying for the exit to come. I didn’t even buy anything! Well, I mean I quickly stopped and powered through for a delicious $1 ice cream cone because come on, I’m not a monster.