Hands off: how to get dudes to stop scoping out your girlfriend

hairy stockings
Sina Weibo
Sina Weibo

What's an overly protective boyfriend to do when he can't be there to fend dudes off from his GF? Buy her a set of hyper-realistic hair stockings, that's what -- thanks, China

Wait, they really make those? Yes. In China, the country that keeps us in content.Why? According to @HappyZhangJiang these "super sexy, summertime anti-pervert full-leg-of-hair stockings" are essential. Do they work? Would you ogle a woman whose leg thatch puts your chest to shame? Exactly.

The only risk is that it backfires, and, knowing they're running interference, she stops shaving.