Married, monogamous couple, once a year or never
YAWN. Just kidding. But yeah, as you can probably guess, monogamous couples don’t have much to worry about. “Couples in long-term monogamous relationships are at a low risk for STD transmission,” says Dr. Jason James, a board-certified OB-GYN in private practice in Miami, Florida. There’s no data on how often to screen lesbians, so Dr. Adalja advises them to follow the same guidelines as heterosexual females. Unless you’re showing symptoms, regularly shoot up or are pregnant, you probably don’t need an STD test if you’re in a monogamous relationship.
But! Sometimes the plot thickens... with adultery! “Deception is involved when monogamy is violated,” says Dr. Nicole Prause, a sexual psychophysiologist. “It’s very common for partners with an outside, concealed partner not to use condoms and not to tell their current, unprotected partner,” Dr. Prause says. “Sadly, testing may be a necessary alternative to good communication for many couples.”
Womp-womp. There’s also a good chance your partner has herpes type I or II (85% of US adults do). “The type no longer indicates the location of [herpes], because oral sex has been extremely common in the US for decades,” Dr. Prause says. She adds that there’s a movement to stop calling herpes “sexually” transmitted, considering you can give it to a baby by pinching its adorable, chubby cheeks.