Dating profiles are the cover letters of the dating world
Online dating is a lot like applying for jobs, Hoehn says: profiles function as cover letters to get your foot in the door. Where most people trip up in writing their own profiles is in leading with rote, dull information. In the grand scheme of things, your matches don’t care whether you live in the West Village or Williamsburg. Though they might care if you live in Weehawken.
People often use cliches, filler sentences, and self-aggrandizement to make certain information more interesting than it is. Don't be that guy. NEVER use words like ‘adventurous’ or ‘spontaneous.’ And it should go without saying, but DON'T TALK ABOUT YOUR EXES. “Try to write the way you speak,” Hoehn advises. “You’re not writing a book report. You want someone to relate to you...[Your matches] want to know what your life is like now, in the present.”
As counterintuitive as it seems, online dating is a medium largely hinged on the written word. It's easy to get lost in the optics and forget just how important you narrative is. And sometimes, you need perspective. Writing a good profile requires you to be unbiased and self-analyzing -- things Hoehn says are hard to sift apart.
The majority of Hoehn’s work is in this vein: building cohesive narratives for her clients through language. “When you put up a profile," she says, "...you want to find the matches that are compatible with you.” In other words, don’t just talk about SoulCycle and Drake because everyone else is doing it. Build your own story. As a favorite Internet podcaster of mine (hint: it’s Judge John Hodgman) once said, “specificity is the soul of narrative.” And if narrative is the window to our souls, most of us are rocking the virtual, expository version of a toupée when we publish our profile: no killer, all filler.
Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email, and get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.