Despite her casual attitude, my friend believes in tradition and the ways it can benefit a relationship. “During this period," she said, "you have to engage in talking to your spouse, and it’s more or a spiritual connection. At least, that’s how I’ve come to understand it."
What’s on the menu?
Let’s say you married to a nice Jewish boy or girl. You’ve got the green light to get down, but can you go down, around, and through the back? Kind of.
"What is agreed upon is that regular is best,” explained one of my sources. “Face-to-face intercourse is a preferable means because it makes it an intimate act, as you literally and metaphorically face each other."
Ultimately, how you have sex depends on your community and varies from couple to couple, just as it does in the secular world. Any questions you might have about sex and your marriage could be directed to your rabbi, but would most probably be answered in your kallah class, which are classes both men and women take in preparation for marriage. Hey, they’re probably a hell of a lot more useful than my liberal arts education. Oy vey.