Sex + Dating

The Joys, Hardships, and Logistical Challenges of Life With a 10.5-Inch Penis

Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Lexington Steele answers the door of his home on the outskirts of Los Angeles. He’s a handsome man, well preserved for 46, muscularly built, standing taller than 6ft, and dressed in a baggy jogging suit. He has a shaved head and a meticulously groomed beard. His place is neat and organized. Sports biographies line the living room shelves. A vintage photo of Michael Jordan as a college center making a jump shot hangs over an entryway. Steele’s pretty French-Canadian wife buzzes around. Their small dogs yap it up and try to get a visitor’s attention. Steele's demeanor is modest and laid-back. Occasional brags are punctuated by a high-pitched laugh. As we sit down at his kitchen table, it's not immediately apparent what he does for a living, or the enormous appendage that has served as the key to his success. Here he is, in his own words. 

My penis is 10 and a half inches long.

The first time I measured it, I was 10 years old and it was only 6in. It kept growing until I turned 22. As a high school kid, I was the third-base champion -- sexually speaking. None of the girls would let me near home plate. I remember one girl being surprised by my size and repulsed by the pain she might endure if we went beyond a hand job. Generally, things ended very abruptly. Girls realized that going any further would be going all the way and they were having none of it. The funny thing, though, is that up until I was in college, I didn’t even realize that I had a big dick. I went to a peepshow once in New York City, when I was about 15, and the woman on the other side of the glass told me to take down my pants. She saw my dick, hesitated for a minute, and said, "Oh, you have a big one." I figured she said that to everybody.

I finally lost my virginity at 17. I was working part time as a runway model, and one of the female models gave me her phone number. She said it would be a good idea for me to call her. I did, and she came out to where I lived with my parents in suburban New Jersey. She was 24 and had a lot of experience. We went to a house where I used to babysit, nobody was home, and I had a key to the front door. We had sex in there, and it was really great, but she didn't say anything about the size of my penis. This girl was 6ft tall and dated a lot of professional basketball players. So she had experienced plenty of large penises.

My boss noticed the size of my penis and he immediately nicknamed me "Log Cabin." That spread through work pretty quickly. When word got out that I had a large penis, people joked that I really was a "big, swinging dick." They’d seriously ask how it felt to come into the office and know that I had the biggest dick on the entire floor of our building. I told people that it never really occurred to me. In truth, the only time I thought about it was if I had to pee or have sex. It's a little bit like owning a Porsche. Unless you're behind the wheel of the car, you’re not thinking about how great it is to have one.

The gangbang was organized by a brother named Dee, and he proved to be an important contact. The first thing he did was invite me to join a group of guys called the Gentle Giants. It was a team of big-dicked brothers who attended sex parties up and down the East Coast. You had to be black and well endowed to join. We drove to places as far-flung as Vermont and Delaware for orgies. There was no payment but it was fun being one of the Musketeers. That provided me with my first experience fucking older women who really knew what they wanted: big black cock. It introduced me to the fact that women can be as sexually aggressive and as powerful as men. In college, guys were the hunters and women were the prey. In this world, the women hunted and we were the prey.

Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

It wasn’t until I went to college at Syracuse University, where I majored in American history, that anybody made a big deal about my size. There was a girl from the field hockey team. She had never been with a black guy before -- by the way, I’d say that 75% of black guys have big dicks, while maybe 19 out of 100 white guys have them; it’s just the math of this whole thing -- and she provided my first experience of a person being completely enamored with my penis. It was the first time I witnessed the wow factor. I’ve since come to call it shock and awe. First there is shock when a woman takes in the size of it -- she saw it and said, "Holy shit!" -- and next comes the awe as she begins enjoying it. She was unabashedly obsessed. She worshipped my dick, and told other people about it. As a result, let’s just say she was not the only one on the field hockey team that I got the opportunity to fuck. You know how girls are. They talk.

I had one experience in college that taught me a lesson about controlling myself. I walked a girlfriend back to her dorm and gave her a passionate kiss goodnight. To get from her dorm to mine, I had to walk through a driveway where a lot of traffic passes. I had on these really cool white track shorts and was thinking about her when all of a sudden I saw people flashing their brights and honking their horns. I realized they were honking at me! I was still thinking about the girl, and for a good half-block, people saw me walking around with a big erection. It actually broke around my tighty-whities. I got embarrassed and went soft immediately. An incident like that one is a total hard-on killer.

Sometimes there can be a fear factor when a woman sees my penis. I try to alleviate that by letting her know that it's not how big it is, it's what you do with it. If I am very aggressive and make things unpleasant for the woman, she will never want to have sex with me again. Under the right circumstances, though, it can be a memorable experience. Because of my length, I can push my penis through a woman's cervix and right into her uterus. Before getting there, the head of my penis comes up against what feels like a wall. I push against it a little bit, it dilates, and it’s as if you have entered another chamber. It’s kind of like a second pussy but it feels like the first one. It's the closest I’ve ever come to de-virginizing somebody. It’s fun to know you can do it, but it does make some women nervous.

I graduated from Syracuse in May of 1993. By June, a boutique investment company hired me. Later, after I received my full broker’s license, the guy I worked for, the one who trained me, wanted to show me how he partied. He took me to my first swinger experience. This was back when anything went on Wall St, and we wound up at a 19-on-one gangbang. We walked in on 17 naked dudes lined up along a wall, getting themselves hard, waiting for their turns to have sex with an attractive white woman. There were two other brokers from our firm; they were butt naked and making small talk while staring up at the ceiling and masturbating. Meanwhile, the woman was taking on three guys while her husband watched.

Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

As an American-history graduate, I found this to be really interesting. Everybody knows that there was a time when black slaves were used sexually, but usually you think of female slaves and white slave-masters; you rarely hear about male slaves fucking the women. But it happened, and if the brother got caught, it was a wrap. He got killed or castrated. I thought of those sexual dynamics as I experienced the change-up of hierarchy that takes place with these interracial relationships. Normally, in most aspects of life, the breakdown of power starts with the Anglo male. In the swingers’ world, the black man becomes the ruling body because of his dick. I was in an environment where women worshipped at the foot of the big black cock. I was with the Gentle Giants for four years and I felt like I was on the Globetrotters or some shit.

My early years working as a broker were a bit of a struggle financially, and I engaged in some activities to earn extra money. Capitalizing on my penis, I modeled in sex magazines and shot a few videos. While doing that, I never worried about anyone at the firm finding out. I didn’t make my second career into a conversation piece, but I don’t think I would have been fired over it. It would have been the lesser of many evils that went down on Wall St in those days. I knew of people doing blow and expensing hookers and engaging in insider trading. My posing nude in a magazine paled in comparison to frying someone's retirement account while high on coke.

By 1998 I was working for a major investment firm on Wall St and considering a break from finance. I decided to move to LA and get into the adult film business. I gave myself two years -- I had enough money to last me that long, plus my broker's license was good until 2000 -- and things started to move right away. With the Gentle Giants, I got used to performing in front of others and people often made videos of the sex parties. So I knew that I wouldn't be camera shy.

Once I started making a living from my dick, I began to think of it differently from how I once did. I felt like a major-league pitcher who needs to support his arm. I went on to utilize vitamins and herbal mixtures in order to enhance long-lasting erections. It's not unlike when a professional athlete takes legal supplements to make his game as good as it can possibly be. I don't need the stuff, but it's nice to take advantage of what's available. I keep my shit groomed and moisturized. I actually put moisturizing lotion on my dick to make sure it has elasticity. If you have dry skin, it's likelier to chafe. Also, I try not to abuse my dick. I don’t have as much personal sex as I normally would because I need to stay sexually energized. I avoid doing oral sex scenes with girls who wear braces, and I try limiting oral sex scenes in general. The likelihood of a girl not being able to open her mouth wide enough to blow me without getting her teeth involved has always been a danger. I had a girl rip open the bottom of my dick with one of her canines once. She wanted to get as much into her mouth as she could. It would have been good for her career. But I was out of work for a week and my dick looked ugly.

Overall, having a big dick has been good for me. Almost 20 years in, I'm nearing the twilight of my career and enjoying every minute of it -- especially when working with women less than half my age. But people need to realize the downside of size. It can negatively impact your psyche in sexual circumstances. There've been times in my life when I was consumed by having women idolizing my dick. It’s addicting and damaging -- just like drugs in a way. It gives you a false sense of bravado. Over the years, though, I like to think that I’ve come to terms with it. I know there's more to life than being well endowed. Hell, I wish my credit score was as good as my dick is long. I would give a guy half my dick for half of his credit score. If only I could.

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Michael Kaplan is a New York-based journalist. He has also written for Details, Wired, Playboy, and The New York Times Magazine, covers gambling for Cigar Aficionado, and is the author of four books. Follow him: @kaplanwords.