That said, I would like us all to take a beat, and think about why lady head is an optional and potentially “icky” sex act while blow jobs are treated as the norm.
The blow-job-trumps-cunnilingus status quo can be seen most obviously in porn. Studies examining the occurrence of sexual behaviors in porn have found blow jobs happen twice as often as cunnilingus. One study even found that anal sex occurs more often than cunnilingus in porn.
Although most of us don’t follow porn as our sex bibles, we absorb sexual norms from those sassy red tubes whether we admit it or not. It is no surprise that the blow job is seen as an essential part of sexy time while eating a woman out is seen as a rare treat. Men can -- and do -- opt out of orally visiting lady bits or just ignore the fact that it is an option altogether. Women don't usually have this option. Blow jobs are part of the sex deal.