We Clothed Playboy's Most Iconic Centerfolds

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist
Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Playboy's days of being the standard in highbrow nudie magazines are over. The last issue with a buck-naked centerfold came out in December; exactly 62 years after Marilyn Monroe graced the first cover in all her bare-ass, buxom blonde glory. With Playboy staff no doubt scrambling to figure out how to pull off clothed photo shoots for its spring issue, we thought we'd help out by dressing up some of the magazine's most famous centerfolds ever.

No doubt people will now actually get Playboy for the articles.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Marilyn Monroe

Original publish date: December 1953

She could probably ball about as well as Kobe at this point.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Jayne Mansfield

Original publish date: June 1963

The Jane Jetson every little boy dreamed of.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Bo Derek

Original publish date: March 1980

There's got to be a Free Willy joke in here somewhere.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Cindy Crawford

Original publish date: July 1988

Finally, we discover the seductive hip thrust that was always missing from the "Monster Mash" dance sequence.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Anna Nicole Smith

Original publish date: May 1992

Marking a new mandate that every Playboy Mansion event hereafter will be a pajama party.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Naomi Campbell

Original publish date: December 1999

In a sea of fresh produce, nary a set of Campbell melons to be found.

Playboy/Jason Hoffman/Thrillist

Jenny McCarthy

Originally published: July/August 2012

Be vewy vewy quiet! She's hunting a wabbit... preferably one with powerful batteries.

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Nicole Caldwell is Thrillist's Sex & Dating Editor and really thinks Playboy ought to reconsider.