Because you don't want the strippers at Lake Lewisville to see you at anything but your athletic best, train your own tight little body at Hydrous Park: a state-of-the-art wakeboarding facility that's open year-round to hook you up with everything you need to get started, potentially making you the Rebecca Black of fiberglassed fun. What they've got:
Three Ponds: The park hosts two beginner ponds and one "normal" one, each designed to ensure smooth and predictable water surfaces, and featuring a first-in-the-US pulley system that pushes the quieter/ faster/ smoother envelope, and's large enough that eight people can be pulled at once, a feat only matched by Madonna during her '87 British tour ("pulling" means "making out in a bar" in England!).
Obstacles: Since it's all about getting air, they've got a series of "kickers" designed to launch you, and "rooftop rails" on which to grind. For advanced boarders, they've installed the only quarter pipe in the US, which cost them $40k, but'll only cost you your dignity, plus $29.95 for an unsoiled bathing suit.
Pro Shop: Rent everything you need, or buy your own equipment, including boards by CWB, plus shirts, shorts, hats, and shades from O'Neill, Fox, Volcom, and Billabong, Aussie for a pipe that'll hold four quarters.
As a testament to the facility's credibility, it's hosting September's Monster Wakeboard National Championships -- where a bunch of guys whose entire income is supplied by an energy drink will run off with all your strippers.