HardCorps Custom Weaponry

While guns themselves can get pretty incredible, their accessories are generally limited to semi-boring stuff like scopes, stands, and magazines, and who even knows the last time your AK-47 actually read its Highlights For Children. Never have anyone ask your gun to connect the dots again, after souping it up courtesy of HardCorps Custom Weaponry

Based in South Cackalacky, HardCorps applies a variety of camo and other designs to your pistol, rifle, or shotgun, made of DuraCoat polymer coating, which is elastic, resists chipping, and can withstand temperatures up to 600° as well as "salty environments", helpful, as it's those hater-filled locales that require you to pack that heat in the first place. There're 75+ solid colors you can select individually or have mixed for a different shade, from low-key hues like "Diamond Plate" silver, "Desert" beige, and "German Olive" gray, to louder action like "Cherry" red, "Everglades" green, and yellow "Sunburst", though not Starburst, 'cause everyone just likes the pinks. They can also apply these colors in a variety of patterns, including ~20 camo looks like the orange/ black/ white "Bengal", the b&w "Winter Twig" or the pixelated "MirageFlage", while snazzier custom work has included sports themes (WV Mountaineers, Miami 'Canes, Dale Earnhardt's car...), flame or tribal markings, and even corporate logos like the green & yellow "John Deere", in case you're planning any ride-on-lawnmower-bys

Turnaround time's about three weeks, and they'll work with you on custom jobs too; they say to get in touch soon, as they "have dropped all prices due to the poor economy", finally answering the probing Highlights question "What's Wrong?"