Until you turn pro, your golf game will never attract women. Since your 42 handicap assures that day won't happen, say hello to CaddyChicks.com.
CC's online reservation system matches golfers with nubile female caddies nationwide. Unlike similar services, these ladies must pass a caddy etiquette test and can work public courses as well as private tournaments. They'll lug bags, pour beers, or just hang out in the cart with you, providing companionship, and eliminating all those lonely Sundays spent ogling boob-shaped fairway traps.
Just type in the area code of the course you're playing, see which Chicks are available, and make your reservation at least a day before tee time. CC will search their database of 3,000 "aspiring models and college students", ensuring your caddy will be photogenic, or at least have passed standardized tests.
Be warned that the ladies set their own prices and are adamant about only being your . So, make sure you're clear in your intentions when you ask her to wash your balls -- or you just might end up losing them.