When pursuing a dream, you've got to be willing to give the shirt off your back, unless your dream is that no one will ever see your tramp stamp. Actually making shirts to keep his dream alive: the dude behind One Kolor.
One Kolor's an online emporium of over 40 cheeky tees that draw from standup Mario DiGiorgio's comic observations, as well as his background in graphic design, a clever way to fund his touring and keep some Adobe over his head. Printed on muted earth tones, recent torso-toppers include Stunt Cock (a rooster in an Evel Knievel helmet), a silhouetted liquor shelf subtitled "Booze: The Instant Vacation", and Modern Wee Jee, with QWERTY lettering, emoticons, and a big TTYL to signal that the board's finished
communing IM-ing with the dead. You can also get your mitts on the mid-century awesome Brobots Before Hobots, Gummi Love (candied bears getting it on), and CAPTCHA designs that read "Austin, Texas" and "Prove You're Human", which you've pretty much already done by not living in Dallas.
If you can handle reading something more than a tee shirt, DiGiorgio is also the author of Cynic's Guide to a Rich and Full Life -- which sounds like it follows the trajectory of a caterpillar blossoming into a butterfly...then landing on the patch just above your crack.