Some of the summeriest gear of all time

Pulling off the surfer vibe can be tough if you aren't one, though it helps when you have a total cannon for an arm. Surfers love football! Helping you look the part without requiring you get your girlfriend kidnapped, jump out of a plane without a parachute, and fall in love with Patrick Swayze: Olasul

Engineered to the "highest standards" from Peruvian and European fabrics by a Lima-born New Yorker, Olasul's aquatic lifestyle threads aren't "so precious that you can't move, surf, swim, and generally live in them", and were inspired by Peru's coast and its similarities to "the face of the Moon", making it a great place to get a Buzz on.

The latest drop's two series of mesh-lined quick-dry shorts, avail in 8" traditional and 5" retro looks: the blue, orange, or red Selva, with a pattern made from a photo of the Amazonian rainforest, and a trio of mind-blowing gradient pastel numbers called the Sunset, the Sunrise, and the Twilight, thankfully keeping someone from releasing a New Moon.

Tees also include temporally themed dip-dyed joints, each with a starkly contrasted chest pocket (yellow on purple, sky blue on red...), plus solid jobs with a sole diagonal stripe on bottom, from the yellow w/ white Sol, to the off-white w/ pink Playa, which was inspired by "pale white sands, blown in from distant dunes", so...not the Syfy channel version starring William Hurt

And because we actually have seasons here, raglan sweatshirts, which incorporate Oxford into either a diagonal stripe on the chest or a triangle at the neck, are made from 100% Peruvian pima cotton. Of course, if you really want to fit in on the beach you're better off finding some 100% pure adrenaline.