Hide your cash in a custom hide

Ensuring you've at least got the first two things covered if Jay-Z asks where you keep your "Money, Cash, Hoes", JW Leather Works' custom leather billfolds are hand-stamped/stitched in pretty much any design you want by a guy who also turns out accessories like sheaths and holsters, so you can stop putting your broadsword down the front of your sweatpants. If you're having trouble coming up with a design, here are some of his sweetest previous commissions:

Cowboy Vs. Robot: This Western-motif cash carrier features a rifle-toting cowboy and a robot with a human brain locked in an arm wrestling competition, and is stamped with the letters KFO, which -- if they're not initials -- probably stand for "Over The Top starring Sylvester Stallone" preceded by some word starting with "K" and another word with "F".

Sam Smith Cakes: If you robbed Sam Smith, you'd get a wallet covered in brightly colored cakes & cupcakes set against a frosting white background, but you'd also be a jerk.

Pocahontas: The scantily clad Native American woman depicted on this sucka is shading her eyes so she can both survey the desolate desert landscape in the background, and presumably see if she's got any dirt on her shoulders.