The 5 Things DJ Whoo Kid Can't Live Without

Whether he's spinning for crowds of 20,000 people around the world, putting out mixtapes with the likes of Snoop Dog and Lil' Wayne, hosting his radio show The Whoolywood Shuffle on Eminem's Sirius XM channel, or playing shows as 50 Cent and G-Unit's official DJ — something he's been doing for the last 10 years — DJ Whoo Kid certainly isn't wasting his time. We caught up with him between gigs to find out what keeps him going, both on the road and off, and to get real with some hard-hitting questions about giant ducks, tiny horses, and mustaches.  

GEAR: Pink Dolphin, Gucci, Endless Ammo Clothing, Nike Air Jordans - $Varies
While rocking streetwear style may not work for everyone, it's elemental to hip hop culture. And you really can't argue with Jordans.
WHOO KID: I don't wear many brands but these are cool and they give me that DJ WHOO KID identity. When you’re a DJ, you need to dress a bit louder to be identified in public. Jordans always work and are great for social media.

TECH: AppleiPhone 5 - $200+ & MacBook Pro - $1,299+
For a guy who criss-crosses the globe playing music for a living and constantly working with dozens of other musicians, having this powerful pair of mobile tools at the ready is crucial.
WHOO KID: My whole work, tour, and radio schedule revolves around my iPhone. If I lose it I might as well commit suicide. Various artists are constantly texting and sending me music to debut on my show, The Whoolywood Shuffle. My MacBook Pro is needed not only for DJing clubs and festivals with my Serato but also to edit my radio show interviews on Sirius XM with Protools.

RIDES: AudiR8 Convertible - $114,900+
Want to hit 60 mph in 4.2 seconds while the fresh air smacks you in the back of the neck? This might be the whip for you. Also, damn it's sexy.
WHOO KID: My favorite car right now! Its a head turner and female magnet. Unfortunately male groupies come with this model which is why peeling off works when they come around.

HOME: BrevilleOracle Espresso Machine - $2,000 & Sharp80-inch TV - $4,800
Touted as the world's first automatic manual espresso machine, this beast takes your drink from start-to-finish like a robot barista. It grinds, doses, and tamps the coffee, then extracts just the right amount of brown gold to your beverage of choice.
WHOO KID: I can't work, f*ck or think without having an espresso to start the day. And my 80-inch screen TV reminds me of my penis. It's big and I play with it every day — my Xbox and Playstation are always on and ready!

VICE:Naked Women - $Varies
No explanation required.
WHOO KID: Beautiful young exotic women is every man's vice. The female body should be illegal; it will make any man do bad things.

And now, for the tough stuff...

Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck, or a hundred duck-sized horses?
[laughter] A hundred duck-sized horses.

Would you rather receive $20,000 right now, or gain the ability to summon Stone Cold Steve Austin three times in your life?
Rather get $20,000 — I'm black.

Would you rather have Cheeto fingers for the rest of your life or have a Kool-Aid mustache for the rest of your life?
Kool-Aid mustache.

Would you rather have hair for teeth, or teeth for hair?
Teeth for hair.

Would you rather have your entire browser history available for people to see or fart confetti?
Fart confetti. [laughter]

Would you rather hold your horses, or cool your jets?
Cool my jets.

Would you rather have a nipple-sized penis, or penis-sized nipples?
[laughter] Nipple-sized penis. Easier to hide.

Would you rather only be allowed to talk in a condescending, mean-spirited style or be required to pee on every person you meet after knowing them for a year?
I'd pee on everyone.

Would you accept $10,000 per year for life if it meant every time you hit your funny bone you pooped your pants?
Yup. No problem.

Would you rather live in Pizza City or on Cheeseburger Island?
Pizza City.

Joe McGauley is a senior editor at Supercompressor and is saving up for a nice pied a terre in Pizza City.