Dude A: Dude, check it. My mom is in my phone as "Drake."
Dude B: Dude… how do you do that?
Hipster chick with gray hair or actual old woman (unclear): That's the thing about art, it's just like… there.
Hot, vacant man: Do you party?
Hot, vacant woman: You're so funny.
Hot, vacant man: *Small dick gets hard*
Hot, vacant woman: *Falls in everlasting love*
Handsome man: What do you do for a living?
Me: I'm a comedian.
Handsome man: Like Amy Schumer?
Me: *Puts headphones in*
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