Your $1,000 is now worth: $339
Date of IPO: April 16th, 2015
Initial price per share: $16
Annualized return: -72.65%
Twee handicrafts and the stock market do not mix that well, apparently. Who knew?
Oracle (ORCL) Your $1,000 is now worth: $610,697
Date of IPO: March 12th, 1986
Initial price per share: $20
Annualized return: 23.91%
Zynga (ZNGA) Your $1,000 is now worth: $259
Date of IPO: December 16th, 2011
Initial price per share: $11
Annualized return: -27.67
Moral of the story: never rest on your laurels, especially when those laurels are Farmville. Zynga's still in the dumps (and so is your $1,000), but at least it seems to be righting the ship, er... tractor?
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Joe McGauley is a senior writer for Thrillist and doesn't really sweat the stock market, since there's always money in the banana stand.