What DOESN'T it do?
While incognito mode is great for hiding activity from your significant other, you won't have the same luck with hackers or the government. Incognito mode does NOT hide activity from your ISP (Comcast, Verizon, etc.), nor does it prevent the sites you visit from logging your activities while you're on the page. In other words, if you're illegally downloading movies or conducting similarly illicit "research," the government will still be able to obtain records of that activity from the company that's giving you access to the internet.
Lastly, private browsing absolutely does NOT prevent your employer from viewing your activity if you're using a work computer. Many employers use key-logging software to track what you type on company hardware, but even if that's not the case, there's nothing to stop them from viewing traffic to your computer's IP address if you're on their network.
This isn't to say your boss is necessarily watching what you do 24/7. Unless you're doing something to raise red flags, like using a ton of bandwidth to download a 4K rip of Battlefield Earth, the IT department probably isn't following your every move.
Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email, and get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.