Don it up at this sexy private Colombian resort

Michael Douglas in Romancing The Stone. Braves pitcher Julio Teherán. Fat Joe. All great men who've been associated with a certain Columbia city on the Caribbean coast, but it's you who'll be known as the new Don Cartagena after booking some fall travel to lean back in luxe boutique hotel Casa San Agustín, especially if your name is Don

You'll down a complimentary cocktail while checking into your sea-colored room, which really should be one of six suites that each have balconies, Jacuzzis, private plunge pools, and iPads, because the real reason you just flew 1700 miles is to play mad Fruit Ninja. Venture out during the day for a tour of the tunnels & trap doors inside the town's historic (and current!) pirate-attack-defending Castle of San Felipe, then swing back for an alfresco dinner of house-cured, dry-aged steak at tropical Latin restaurant Alma. Later, hang around the pool bar or solarium for cocktails, or hit hotspots like the string-lit/ graffiti-tagged Bazurto Social Club ("Sirven un buen cerviche clásico cartagenero," says Trip Advisor commenter Xbaquero!) for reggae and Afro-Colombian tunes

And then there's the most ballerific option of all: for $7k you get Benz rides to/ from the airport, a day on a private yacht on Islas del Rosario with swimming, snorkeling, Champagne, and a private chef, plus admission to Café Havana, or "Cartagena's most exclusive club", though with your new status you probably won't dance, you'll just pull up your pants and do the Rockaway.