The craziest 5mph drive ever

Because driving your own car on boring normal roads this Summer is gonna get old, drive someone else's car on insane stuntman-esque obstacle roads (!) with this (probably) Jason-Statham-approved, off-road adventure package at Quail Lodge in Carmel, where things're sure to get sticky

So here's how it works: You'll climb into the driver's seat of an off-road-ready beast from their brand-new fleet of late-model, $60k Land Rovers, pop in your Smash Mouth's Greatest Hits cassette, and traverse a section of their 850-acre property via slow-moving-by-design-cause-otherwise-you're-totally-gonna-die courses that increase in difficulty based on your skill level. All-terrain challenges include near-free-falling down an almost vertical, two-track trail, side-tilting across a bevy of boulders, and bobbin' and weavin' in between narrow trees slalom-style. But wait, there's more: in an effort to add terrain that'll increase both your "off-road knowledge and ability", the course also contains less-likely-in-the-real-world, near-tractionless obstacles like oh-crap-navigate your vehicle over three massive logs, then having to check your pants for any additional ones

Since you're clearly already there, Quail Lodge's actually pretty sweet too, with an award-winning golf course, hiking, bocce, and a restaurant with eats like nachos w/ Guinness-braised short ribs, which will never, ever get old... unless you leave them in your car... or someone else's.